"This one is compliments of John from the land down under:Police work can be entertaining as well as dangerous.Recently, a female sheriff's deputy arrestedPatrick Lawrence, a 22 year old white male, who was fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of a field at night. The next day, at the GwinnettCounty (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency and public intoxication. The suspect explained that he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop.'You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles, or at least I thought there was no one around' he stated. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his pressing need.'Guess I was really into it, y'know?' he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process of doing the deed,. “Yeah, probably. I swear to you, though, that I’m not using my power on you guys all the time. I wouldn’t feel right doing that, Maria. That’s why I told all of you the truth,” I said as she continued to stare out at the sky.I watched her for a minute, feeling sorrow for her again. She was so beautiful, so tiny, and yet so hurt. I forced myself to turn away; I had things to do, and starting to feel melancholy wasn’t one of them.“Billy, you be a good boy for Aunty Maria! Okay?” Sheila told him as she gave him a big hug and a big wet kiss, which made him giggle.“Otay, Mommy! I luv youse!” he gurgled happily.“I love you too, my little Billy-goat!”“Tanty Maria, can I’z watch cartoofs? Peease?” Billy asked as soon as his mother put him down.“Sure, but after that, I’m going to read you a story, okay?”“Otay!”I surveyed my happy group of sexy girls—they were all dressed in tiny shorts, form-fitting t-shirts, runners with short socks, and they each had on stylish sunglasses. I’d bought them.
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